Tonight I was extremely impacted by a particular movie that I had never seen..."P.S. I love you" I am still awake at this unnatural hour, because I tried laying next to my husband, but horrible thoughts kept me awake and restless. As he and I layed on the couch earlier watching this movie about a woman losing her husband to a brain tumor at an incredibly young age, I looked over at my husband and thought "what on earth would I ever do?". He squeezed my hand tightly as we both were fighting back tears, because the thought of one of us having to exist without the other is just extremely unfathomable. Before I met Jonny, I remember watching "hollywood" romances and thinking to myself..."does that exist?" "I want that". I never imagined in all of my wildest dreams that I could have what I so often saw personified on the big screen. After going through a gutwrenching divorce, I swore off true romance and stamped it as unrealistic, sealed it and tucked the idea of it away. After my divorce and settling back into real life, starting over with just Piper and I, I could have never prepared myself for the incredible man I was about to meet. Jonny is more than anything Hollywood could muster. It is virtually impossible for me to put into words the type of man he is, the way we connect, how my words come out of his mouth just as I open my own to speak them for myself. I am baffled by what we have...I don't question it, I just thank God I found it. I know that people search their entire lives for this and often end up settling for what they believe to be "close enough" or "he's everything I want, but I wish he were more..." Those lines don't exist with Jonny. HE IS EVERYTHING I WANT. period. Laying in bed tonight, we both discussed what misery it would bring to have to lay our heads down on our pillow at night alone. How it would be difficult to function. How life would be immensely empty without the other in it. I couldn't hug him tight enough. Life is just so precious, isn't it? One minute, you think something is important in your life...then you have a brush with what "could be" and then all of a sudden what seemed important all of a sudden shape shifts into something petty and merely convenient. I can't say enough about my husband...what joy he has brought into my life and what he has shown me in terms of what it means to truly have found REAL, unconditional love. God has blessed Piper and I so deeply. I am so glad to have been moved by this movie...it really grabbed ahold of me and knocked me on the head. Hug your significant other super tight...be appreciative...take notice of what amazing individuals they truly are. Soak up every ounce of love that you share and relish the moments that God has been gracious enough to allow us to share with one another. They are gifts...precious gifts.
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May 12, 2008
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holy crap i watched that on friday - its SERIOUSLY been on my mind every second since. good movie - but HORRIFYING reality! hahaha... im still a bit sick over it. LOL....
Posted by: Keri Schimpf | May 12, 2008 at 06:43 AM
What truth in your words! God couldn't have led me to read that at a better time- today when I was SO annoyed with my husband. Makes me think... thank you!!
Posted by: nikki | May 12, 2008 at 11:04 PM
I'm wicked jealous...but happy for you.
Posted by: Steve | May 14, 2008 at 11:00 AM
My husband and I watched it last week together. I am so blessed to have found my soul mate and I often worry about what I would do if he were suddenly gone. I think we have to live for the moments that we have now, make each day as special as it can be and give the rest to God.
Posted by: Merideth Elaine | May 17, 2008 at 10:46 AM